How are generations defined? How are they labeled? How do you differentiate a Gen Xer from a millennial or a baby boomer? Who are the people born on the borders of those generational margins? Well, this post isn’t about that. There are hundreds upon thousands of articles that define and debate and outline the generations. This post is more about my cringing every time someone is labeled and defined by the year they were born and associated with people born within the same time span.

There’s nothing more complicated than a human, so why are we lumping people born within a certain time period into a group and insisting they are cut from the same cloth? Our obsession with labeling and categorizing and placing things in buckets has created this generational system that has us quick to say, “Well, she’s a millennial, she’s too fragile.” Sure, some millennials might be and so might some baby boomers because, well because, science.

And, of course, people of the same generation have similar characteristics due to technology, environmental surroundings, etc. … It’s pretty similar to the way families work. You’re around similar people, you pick up their mannerisms, their habits, and even speech. Look at music in the early 2000s; you couldn’t tell the difference between a Backstreet Boy and that other band. To me, generational characteristics are akin to horoscopes. You read into them enough, you start believing you have to marry a Virgo or Capricorn because you’re a Taurus, or that all millennials are entitled. Really?

After we lump people into categories and bestow sweeping generalizations such as “all baby boomers do A” and “all millennials think B,” it leads us to talk about how they cannot possibly get along because of XYZ. Stop it. That’s categorizing people like cow breeds. That may be a good way to identify cows, but not people. It’s also a little bit like high school and we’re forming cliques.

How does this generational categorization and identification affect the workplace and your relationship with your peers? Depends on how seriously you take labels and how honest you are with yourself about your preconceived notions about others, based on what others have said, what you’ve read, and other influences in your world. Whether the difference is generational or cultural, it’s easy to blame those preconceived ideas because someone said “that’s how all women are,” or “boys will be boys,” or “millennials need naps,” whatever any of that means.

So, really, let’s just ditch the labels—all of them, for that matter—and start making decisions about someone’s ability and character based on their work ethic, passion, honesty, intelligence, humor, drive, kindness, respect, and compassion. And terrible taste in music.

How do we do that? Through patience, listening, compassion, kindness, patience, honesty, humor, patience, respect, and intelligence. And bourbon. Because, let’s face it, sometimes all of the above still won’t help you work well with others.

And that’s OK. We don’t all have to get along. (But we do have to respect each other.)